Sunday 18 January 2015

The Fear Of Cat Calling Or Just Talking To Women On The Street For Aspie Men

ORCHESTRAL SUITE No. 3 in D minor.
Most people know an different arrangement used in the Hamlet cigar adverts. For me it reminds me of an character's brutal death in battle royale. It's so easy to tell the difference between right and wrong. To judge from afar. But sometimes when the chips are down, you've been on a nice winning streak and then disaster happens, most people 'don't want to be a loser anymore'. Sometimes it's better to burn out then to fade away. Some people deserve some time in the sun. Because similar people or even close friends don't get that chance. I love being an aspie. Everything is slowly making sense to me.
Even in the darkest days of self harm and suicidal thoughts... I'm learning about myself everyday and trying to organize myself and get the help needed to do some of the things that I can't or struggle to. Some aspies, you think they are lucky being blessed with wealth like Elliot Rodger but that doesn't change the fact he was extremely angry and frustrated so he went on a killing spree. Did he also kill himself?
Marcus Jannes did.
The 21 year old aspie from Norway hung himself live on webcam. Why? Struggled with social skills. Extremely lonely. I thought about giving you more names linked with aspergers syndrome, low social skills and harm themselves and yes on rare occasions other people but it's normally the self harm, poor socialising and an often mixed bag good and bad social traits. For example:
pro - I can be obsessive and passionate about things I like and enjoy, picking random facts out of the air I have practically remembered all my life.
Con - poor organizational skills. This includes time management and random tasks.
And of course, my social skills. Admittedly I'm not as bad as some aspies but I can make groups of people feel uncomfortable and I'm extremely bad with cues in conversations. I remember almost being banned from a group's events because I was that hardcore. I made a decision after that to all but stop going to those events. I feel embarrassed to show my true colours and also I HATE being censored. I just wish some people would know the differences between my jokes and my actual facts. This makes meeting new girls hard enough job as it is but there's an double edged sword with '10 hours being a woman in NYC' trending online.
I keep getting flash backs to clips of pick up artists uploading videos of sexual assault and harassment. But I know there also exists videos of mixed groups of people casually chatting, nicely. Friendly. Why don't these videos ever trend? My fear is this: we are living in a world full of strangers and enemies.
I remember an car advertistment featuring a somewhat food chain of traffic and travel: the pedestrian hates the cyclist, the cyclist hates the car drivers and I think if I remember it right EVERYONE hates the truck/lorries. See what I meant about random facts. I'm concerned more education is needed NOW. To understand where people are coming from. Monogamous dislike polyamorous. Polyamorous hate swingers. Swingers (seem to) dislike transgender/gender community. But I'm getting of topic.
I have seen a number of newspapers articles about Twitter wars of the sexes. Lesbians arguing with transgender off the top of my head but one between cis men and a woman made me itch my head. The woman in the 10 hours NYC actually enjoys being cat whistled? I think it's called that. Some women enjoy the attention and so they should. I appreciate a beautiful woman as much as anyone. But I'm terrified about coming across as creepy if I tell them that or similar. I'm very confident and I have certain tastes: women left alone for a bit in a bar/club is like parking a sports car in a ghetto. Sometimes they can get stolen. Often. Or the fear of it. But I didn't proper read the twitter war between the man at the butchers and the food blogger who took offensive being told she 'sounds sexy' on the phone. I guess it's all about content. But that might be the problem. It's not the phrases themselves but the TIMING of those phrases. Sometimes. Which brings me back to my original issue.
I can only pray I make it Crystal clear to the women I speak to the difference between me being nice, me badly flirting or me poking fun with my female friends. I just hope I'm original when chatting online.
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